Extremely Loud and Incredibly FAQ

By Andreas

So. You’ve just watched the trailer for Stephen Daldry’s film adaptation of Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. You’re confused, and perhaps a little curious. “Why does that title have so many adverbs?” you wonder aloud. “And can my body really withstand that much exposure to U2?” I understand. I was once like you. In order to assuage your confusion, I’ve assembled this little set of Frequent Asked Questions…

Q: Are you fucking kidding me?

A: No. It’s for real.

Q: After 2 1/2 minutes of über-precocious voiceover, I really hate that kid. Is this normal?

A: Oh my yes.

Q: Why does Tom Hanks laugh so hard when his son brings him a rock? It’s just… a rock.

A: I don’t know, but the answer probably has to do with 9/11.

Q: How many shots does the trailer contain where Sandra Bullock cries while reminiscing about her husband, embracing her son, or sitting down?

A: So many. But seriously, it was like 6.

Q: Why would finding what the key fits be a miracle?

A: Because, silly: New York! Imagination! Adventure!

Q: I see that the kid meets an irascible Max von Sydow. Will he teach Max von Sydow to stop being so irascible and appreciate life again?

A: Almost certainly YES.

Q: The kid then encounters John Goodman, who also looks pretty irascible. Will the same life appreciation lessons apply here?

A: See previous answer.

Q: At 1:44, why is the kid surrounded and touched by “ethnic” people?

A: I don’t know, but I’d guess it involves the words “precocious,” “messianic,” and “9/11.”

Q: Do the streets really have no names? Or are their names just very well-hidden?

A: Only Bono knows for sure.

Q: Was this trailer inspired by the “Forts & the Inbetween” video?

A: Probably.

There you go! The trailer has been demystified. I’ll have another FAQ ready in January, when EL&IC sweeps up every possible Oscar nomination, including one for Best Animated Short Film.

2 Comments

Filed under Cinema

2 responses to “Extremely Loud and Incredibly FAQ

  1. Rebekah

    Q: Has my intelligence been insulted?

    A: See question 1.

  2. Rebekah

    Also wow a truer post has never been written. (I am laughing like Jimmy Durante.)

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